Teen Suruchi Phogat wants to shoot fearlessly again

Last year, Suruchi Phogat ruled the World Shooting with five gold and a bronze. A year later, she has realised that there is a cost to winning too.The Haryana shooter, who had started her senior shooting journey as an undeterred force, is now coming to terms that shooting is more than just winning. It is about winning despite losing. “When I started last year, I didn’t fear anything. I knew only how to shoot, without worrying about the results or success or failures,” Suruchi, who missed out on the podium in the women’s 10m air pistol match at the Asian Shooting Championships on Wednesday.“Because the start was so good for me, all I learnt was to win. I did well at the National Games and won gold. Won gold medals at all World Cups, so winning felt natural to me. But it changed when I couldn’t win a medal at the Asian Championships last year, then the World Championships and national championships also went without a medal,” said Suruchi, only 19. “Me not winning medals at these meets instilled some fear in me,” Suruchi admitted.The teenager said the fear has made her conscious, but she is still not taking it as pressure. “It isn’t the pressure where I feel my heartbeats increasing while shooting or getting sweaty hands. I have been made conscious that there are things riding on medals and that feeling somewhere changes the process,” she said.The youngster wants to go back in time. “I wish I can get back the mindset that I had last year. I want to be that Suruchi again, who didn’t think about anything and was fearless,” she said.The pistol shooter also said that she now trains without any coach. “I train on my own. I had Suresh Kumar as my coach earlier, but we haven’t spoken for a long time. If I get stuck anywhere, I discuss it with the national coaches,” she said.